Nebraska State Senator Ernie Chambers (D-Omaha) filed a lawsuit against God a few days ago, citing a laundry list of accusations including “fearsome floods, egregious earthquakes, horrendous hurricanes, terrifying tornadoes, pestilential plagues, ferocious famines, devastating droughts, genocidal wars, birth defects, and the like.”
Not only has Chambers sued God, but he has also extended the lawsuit to cover God’s followers (“Christians” if you will). Chambers states that God’s followers have “made and continues to make terroristic threats of grave harm to innumerable persons.” The article is quite hilarious, and Chambers keeps it plausible, staying within the boundaries of the biblical Creator’s own rules.
Chambers need not serve God with a notice of the lawsuit since God is all-knowing. Chambers filed to suit to poke fun at the judicial system, proving that they will allow lawsuits to be filed for any reason. Perhaps this stunt will get the rusty cogs working on our government branches so that ladies can’t sue for hot coffee, fat kids can’t sue McDonald’s for making them fat, and dumbasses can’t sue dry cleaners for $67 million over a pair of pants.
Chambers is also agnostic, so I think this lawsuit was also meant to poke fun at Christians for doing exactly what he claims. Threatening eternal damnation and hellfire is pretty much the bread and butter of Christianity for some. Otherwise, why would you give up the ability to *gasp* have sex before marriage?
Surprisingly, God responded to the lawsuit, with a magic *poof* and the papers just sat atop the desk of John Friend, clerk of the Douglas County District Court in Omaha. God states that Chambers misses the point of human suffering, saying “I created man and woman with free will and next to the promise of immortal life, free will is my greatest gift to you.” St Michael the Archangel was listed as a witness in lieu of contact information for God. Can’t they just pray?
